Many of you know that at the end of 2021, I will leave Instagram with less than two weeks. I need to take a break to reset, hoping to find some clear answers. In early 2021, I started to set clear boundaries for the way I use the app, and it helped in some ways, but over time, with my creativity and clarity of mind, these boundaries began to fade. This is what I learned from two weeks later, if you also take a break, please let me know how it is going.
First of all, two weeks is not enough. I barely touched the surface that my mind needs. I spent the last few days until I went back in fear. When I finally downloaded the app again and opened it this morning, I didn’t feel good about it. I scrolled casually and realized that I didn’t miss it. When I scrolled through my feed and watched stories about the 2021 retrospective, NYE celebrations and general highlights of people’s lives, I felt like I was wasting my morning. I felt tired and closed the application. I don’t want to go back, but I still go back, which gave me a second understanding.
I am addicted to Instagram. I am also addicted to my cell phone. I lied to myself thinking that I could set boundaries, set rules for myself, and beat the system in some way. but I can not. The system does not work like this. This technology, these apps, they are addictive. To keep us there and give us a dopamine shock, so we continue to go back and find more. A few days before I took a break on Instagram, I picked up my phone and searched for apps. Didn’t even think about it. It’s so dumb. Just like me on an autopilot, a robot that needs me to repair. This makes me feel sick. Over time, I find that I no longer need it, but Instagram will pop up my email inbox to remind me of the unread messages, likes, comments, and new followers I have missed. This brings me to the third thing I learned.
I have linked my value to Instagram. This is not necessarily something I just realized, but the break time makes it feel too clear. My self-worth and my actual financial value are deeply intertwined with this application. Last year made this very obvious. Although I have blazed my own path in many ways, I have also subscribed to this formula, so many writers and creatives find themselves in trouble. Play games and get rewards, but at what price? As more and more brands spend advertising funds on Instagram, creatives are forced to spend more time on Instagram. Take a moment and you will be punished. In 2021, the more time I take a break from Instagram, the more I can see that my followers are declining and my engagement rate is getting lower and lower. In order to win on Instagram, you must follow their changing rules, but the first rule is not to leave.
I asked myself the following questions during the break: “If Instagram is not responsible for most of my financial livelihood, will I still be there?” At first I was not sure, maybe I will continue, if there is no additional work pressure, I might like it. But over time, it became clear that the answer was no.
During the break I watched a great movie called “Climber”. Without revealing much, it follows the journey of free solo climber Marc-André Leclerc. Most of the content of this movie impressed me, but there was one thing I kept playing in my mind. Before he was about to embark on the biggest climb in his life, he said in an interview: “It’s kind of interesting. The actual achievement doesn’t really change your life as you think, but all you have left is to get you to That step of the journey.”
For me, living an ordinary life for most of my life, I don’t mean it badly, so maybe it’s not appropriate to use this word to describe it. But some of the best parts of life, it can be said that most of them are not “worthy to show on Instagram”.The more I see the more every day, every week, every month, every year, the more I desire to live meaningfully and intentionally, to Experience it. This is not to say that a meaningful life cannot coexist with Instagram or social media, but I want to know how much we missed because of it.
I thought I would have a simple answer in the end, but the truth is that I don’t have one. I haven’t even touched the surface of the community and what it means in a constantly changing world connected by technologies and applications such as Instagram. This is not all bad. That community, the community you are in, means a lot to me. But honestly, I think it’s time to make a plan to get out of the Instagram world. No matter how we spend our days, life is passing by, and I don’t want to go back and leave regrets for the journey.
