The whole world is at our fingertips. With just a few taps and a fingerprint on a button, you can unlock an entire digital world where we all go to great lengths to try and make a name for ourselves — or should I say, a handle. When you’re scrolling through your IG, Facebook or TikTok feed, it’s easy to start associating yourself with the IG model you see, the wealthy ex-classmate who just bought a sports car, or a couple (with abs) who are traveling the world watching Up happy as hell.
I think on social media these days, comparison really becomes a dangerous beast because our snapshots are not snapshots of reality. However, at the beach, at the supermarket, at events, you see and meet other (in your mind) fabulous people who are more crushing than you, and comparisons can easily happen.
I’m not going to lie and say comparing yourself to others is something you can totally disappear. It’s a natural inclination that we all have. However, there are ways to free yourself from that destructive “she’s more X than me” mentality and move toward a life that makes you feel good.
Get inspired, not jealous
When it comes to the comparison game, a lot of the negative emotions we generate are because we think we can’t be or do or have what the person we envy is being or is doing or having. Sometimes it may be true. If you’re five feet tall, you probably won’t be able to model on a fashion show. If you have five kids, it can be tricky to leave everything behind and travel the world. But beneath these two factors is another factor. Maybe you want to feel healthy and beautiful. Maybe you want more freedom.
A good trick is to name it “jealousy” when it comes to your mind, then step back and think about what you’re really jealous of. Does this person seem to be living a life full of passion? Are they unapologetically fighting over their business? Think about what you want to cause you to compare yourself, and try to use it as a source of inspiration rather than jealousy. Name your emotion and use it as inspiration.
focus on creating
The best antidote to comparison or competition is to create. Once you’ve identified something that makes you compare yourself to others, you can identify what other people have that are so attractive to you. Then, set some goals and completely exclude others. Focus on creating new experiences and working toward your goals, not what others are doing.
Create from abundance
Another problem with comparing our lives to others is that we often think in terms of lack. We see other people living wonderful lives and think, they’re killing the game out there, we can’t all be like that because there’s not enough stuff to move around. Instead, see the world as full of good things for all of us. The world benefits when people believe in themselves and pursue success. You don’t have to push people down just to get to the top. Rich, baby. Rich.
only compete with yourself
This is the golden ticket! There’s a saying, “No one is you, that’s your strength.” It’s unfair to compare ourselves to other people because we’re all totally different individuals with unique talents that we share with the world. You can only compete with who you were yesterday and focus on getting better and moving towards the life you want, even if they are trivial. You can’t compare yourself to anyone else because guess what? You are not them. Let them inspire you, but don’t try to stack yourself up. It’s like asking a toddler if ice cream or cake is better. Um, two? ! Uh.
Calm down and think about your real situation, real think
One of the best ways to get rid of the urge to compare yourself to others is to develop a good relationship with yourself. Sometimes we confuse what we want and what motivates us with what is socially acceptable, attractive or popular. This is why meditation, journaling, solitude and self-reflection are so important. They can help you cut out all the noise and get what you really want.I can’t stress enough the importance of knowing what it is you Really really want to get out of life and believe in your ability to create it.
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