What do humans look for in life? What is the common ground that we are trying to find? There are tons of lists of what people are looking for to make them happy, ranging from as short as 5 items to as long as 20, showing that no matter how different we are culturally, we are similar at the core of the human experience.
What many lists have in common is that people spend their lives trying—successfully or not—to feel safe, to feel important, to feel that they belong. However, whether it is work or life, we are all chasing “the one” who suits us in every aspect of life likerelationship or moneyand all other content that falls under these three primary content categories.
Here are some areas to work on to better prepare us for “the one.”
sense of belonging
mayo clinic Ask “Is it important to belong?” The answer is yes. “A sense of belonging is fundamental to the way humans organize themselves. If it were not important, we would live alone…we would have no family, community or organized government,” the report said. “We cannot equate the importance of belonging with our physical and mental health。 When we feel supported and not alone, we are more resilient and often cope more effectively with difficult times in our lives. Coping well with difficulties can reduce the physical and mental impact of these situations. “
So how do we “belong more”?one way is to try more contact with people. For introverts, it’s really an effort to put yourself out there, talk to people and do activities with them. The next and most important thing is to keep an open mind and welcome the changes in your expanding world—accept them for who they are, and notice that they have a different personality than you.
When you keep an open mind with people and make an effort to get to know them, friendships may start to blossom and you become more open to the possibility of dating and pursuing romantic relationships and enjoying the process. You don’t think that romantic attachment will end up hurting you. You work more to make it work.
Getting involved in neighborhood communities or groups that support the things you care about is also a great way to feel like you belong in something other than yourself.
important
Authors Isaac Prilleltensky and Ora Prilleltensky Definition important As “feeling valued and adding value”.They say it’s essential for health, happiness, love, work and socializing Welfare“Feeling important is one of the most defining features of our humanity. When that feeling is present, we thrive. When it’s not, we feel neglected and helpless. As we have in the past As has been seen in decades of school shootings, threats to the physical can undermine dignity and can be devastating.” Their book how people matter Explain how promoting importance within the community promotes healthy and equal fairness.
This is consistent with a study scientific america, which found “important psychological constructs that measure risk for depression, suicide and other disorders.” It starts when we are young. “What makes parental neglect so damaging is that it sends a message to children that they feel unimportant, neglected and insignificant.”
what to do? Add value to people’s lives and the company you work for. This can be in the form of friendship, listening, showing up for the big moments, and doing your best at work.
In the workplace, branding yourself as a valued employee means constantly developing your skills, whether it’s in your job description or not.Engaged employees who use their skills and attitude to contribute to the team better chance For career development. Then you can choose “that” in your career. You are no longer chasing jobs, but they are chasing you. Ultimately, you can decide whether to keep working or start your own business.
feel safe
this University of Sussex Say: “Feeling safe and secure means having a sense of control over yourself and your environment. Exploring, discovering, and challenging your boundaries can be really fun and help you understand who you are. And physically safe ways to do that.”
The study goes on to say that when you feel safe, you can do more, “you have the confidence to deal with problems without lasting negative effects on you, the people you care about, or other things that are important to you — like your work or school.”
Security is closely related to the freedom to do what you care about, what you enjoy doing, and what you are passionate about.
When you feel safe, you feel more confident in your decisions and you are mentally and emotionally ready to pursue and achieve “those” that make you happy, feel safe, and celebrate life.
As you seek, strive for, attract, work for, and even enjoy “those” love, life, family, career, happiness, and personal happiness, one way to feel safe, secure, and confident is to be true to those “yes” of people say “yes” to care for and protect you – no matter where you are.
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