Pregnancy Guilty Layer Cake

Last time I posted about my pregnancy, I was sharing my trying to get pregnant a second time. Ironically, I actually took a pregnancy test the next day and it came back positive. Sometimes the timing of life is truly exciting. It’s crazy how something that felt all-in at the time now feels like a distant memory.

I am now six months pregnant and my due date is early December. She’s going to be a fiery little Sagittarius (like Jesse 😉). Especially with this pregnancy, time flies by so fast. I began to realize what a luxury it was to be pregnant and not have children. Don’t get me wrong, it’s no easy feat either. There was no time to rest or even remember that I was pregnant in the first place. What a whirlwind!

During a recent planning meeting, Jesse and I discussed All the Complications of Pregnancy. I shared with her all the different aspects of pregnancy that cause women so much guilt.we feel the anticipationGoing through all the stages of motherhood Including pregnancy, despite how painful they can be sometimes. When we don’t feel the love, magic, or joy of these stages, we can feel alone and ashamed. After sharing some of my current pregnancy guilt, Jess calls it a layer cake, and we love the metaphor.

If, like me, you’re in the midst of a pregnancy and feeling guilty from every angle, today’s post is for you. Here are some thoughts on pregnancy guilt and how to get over it.

Pregnancy Guilty Layer Cake

I really like the layer cake analogy because it’s so accurate. Guilt runs so deep and has so many layers.right expectations female The social status is very high, not to mention the mother. I remember during my first pregnancy, I would be amazed when people would ask me how I was feeling and I would respond bluntly, “like shit”.

People are used to mothers smiling and insisting, whether they actually feel good or not. Our culture not only expects us to enjoy pregnancy, but we impose it on ourselves as well. We want to be the ones who embrace pregnancy and think it’s the most beautiful experience, but the reality is that for many women, pregnancy isn’t all sunshine and rainbows.

For many women, pregnancy is a surprise Although it takes two people to have a child, the responsibility for carrying and delivering the child rests entirely with the woman. Governments in many of our states are now forcing women to continue pregnancies against their will. It’s a horrific way of having to create life, and brings so much guilt on someone who sacrifices their own body.

phosphorusreign can be very unpleasant For many women. From nausea to fatigue, headaches, constipation, dizziness, anxiety and insomnia, the list goes on… Sharing your body with a tiny human is not an easy task. Pregnancy is also a time of uncertainty This can cause a lot of anxiety and stress. With thirty percent of pregnancies ending in miscarriage, it’s hard not to spiral into thoughts of the myriad of complications that can arise throughout pregnancy. Pregnancy has so many restrictions. You cannot eat certain foods because of a weakened immune system. You can no longer participate in certain activities that may be stressful or harmful to your baby.

All of which is to say, pregnancy is actually a miracle. A large percentage of couples try to conceive for years without success. So when you are pregnant, you feel the burden of needing to enjoy this lucky miracle. As exciting as it is to finally meet your sweet little baby and bring this child into the world, sometimes it feels totally unfair that women have to carry all the burden themselves. For some people, finding out they’re pregnant can be scary and cause panic. Even if it’s something you’ve always wanted and tried to do, the reality of a baby turning your world upside down can throw you completely off balance. These feelings can come as a surprise and lead to a great deal of shame and guilt. Shouldn’t I be happy? You may be wondering. Just know that all of these feelings are completely normal and valid. You have every right to feel anything that may happen.

It’s okay if you don’t feel your pregnancy glow. You are not alone, and you don’t need to be. You can be miserable during pregnancy but also be excited to meet your new baby. Both of these things can exist. You also feel exhausted and unable to give 100%. Trying to work while pregnant can feel like a marathon. Do what you need to do to get through it. It’s okay if you just don’t have the energy to play with your kids. Take a nap instead of doing laundry or getting extra work done. Make some time for yourself—get a massage, take a prenatal yoga class, spend time with friends. Eat the delicious food you want and stop feeling guilty about it. Believe in yourself, trust your body. You got this.

Resources and Tips for Pregnancy Success

Jessie shared some of her Tips for Pregnancy Survival The article from a few years ago is really helpful, especially if you are suffering from Hyperemesis.

born from within

This book, born from within Many women have recommended it to me now. I’m just getting started and am excited to delve into it over the next few months. This interactive book guides mothers through exercises and activities to analyze their thoughts and fears about becoming a mother.

Hypnobirthing Course

A friend of mine shared her meditation Hypnobirthing Course They have been very helpful in both my pregnancies. I’ve been battling PTSD after going through my first rather traumatic labor. These meditations are really hypnotic in a way and were very helpful in changing my mindset and calming me down when I started my spiral at 2am with pregnancy insomnia… 😵‍💫

Pregnancy Pop Drops

Another friend recommended these Pregnancy Pop Drops They are truly a taste of life. I was nauseous until a few weeks ago… I swear it’s girl hormones! But I always keep some pregnancy sticks in my purse, and they’re great for nausea relief whenever it comes up on the go.

Unite

I’m not a doctor and certainly can’t advise on medication, but Unisom (an over-the-counter sleep aid) has been another life taste for me during this pregnancy. Some people combine it with B6, which is one of the best ways to prevent nausea. I take a pill every night and it makes me feel good enough to start my day. Whenever I forget to take it, I wake up. Always consult a doctor before taking!

tight maternity dress

When I was six months pregnant, I hated anything that was attached to me. Pact Maternity Collection This is exactly what I want and need right now. Their organic cotton feels really good on my body, and the simplicity of each piece makes it versatile enough for everyday practical wear.

Carla Duvall Pilates and Yoga Glo

I started using Kara’s Online Pilates Platform Just before getting pregnant, I’m so glad I’m pregnant! After suffering from chronic back pain for over a decade, I can safely say this has been a very important part of my recovery and healing journey. Kara is unique in that she focuses on breathing, functional movement, stability, but also has this really beautiful refreshing sense of humor and the biggest heart. Kara is actually a recent resident of Woodstock and we’re glad she lives locally as well. I highly recommend Kara. At this stage of my pregnancy, I feel strong and pain free, which is a huge difference from my last experience!

Yoga Glo is my other top choice Ivory Coast Jenkins One of my favorite yogis of all time. Her prenatal series is the perfect blend of education, exercise and meditation. Another lovely person who can feel the beautiful energy through the screen!

Pregnancy and becoming a mother is a life-changing, beautiful and difficult experience. Be easy on yourself.